SECRETS are IMPOSSIBLE to keep. Many people think that what they do in private only affects them and no one else. Drinking, drugging (even prescription medication), lusting, how you are treating your family, whatever you are doing in “private” can and usually does affect your family, friends, your reputation, and ultimately you are damaging your relationship with God. What we hide in the darkness has a way of eventually showing itself in the light, and the consequences are often greater than we ever imagined. Private choices become public consequences when they begin to shape our character, our relationships, and our walk with the Lord Jesus. There is no such thing as a secret life that God does not see, because He sees every thought, every motive, and every action. We may fool people for a while, but we can never hide anything from the One who knows us completely. The good news is that conviction is not meant to destroy us; it is meant to turn our hearts back toward God. Jesus spoke harshly to those that look good on the outside, and yet inside there was something wrong. I am convicted when I read what is written in *Matthew 23:25 “Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you cleanse the outside of the cup and dish, but inside they are full of extortion and self-indulgence. 26 Blind Pharisee, first cleanse the inside of the cup and dish, that the outside of them may be clean also.* There have been times in my Christian walk that I have not been what I wanted to be, I was not living right before God when no one else was looking and because of that I reflect quite often on the words written in *Matthew 3:1 In those days John the Baptist came preaching in the wilderness of Judea, 2 and saying, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand!”* and I take those words to heart more today than any time in my life. Repentance is not reserved for the worst sinner in the room; it is something every one of us needs when God reveals an area of our lives that is not pleasing to Him. None of us should believe that failure disqualifies us from returning to God, because His mercy gives us another opportunity to turn around. Whether the struggle is large or small, whether it has been hidden for days or years, today is still a day when we can choose to come back to Him. There is hope for the person who feels ashamed, hope for the person who has fallen again, and hope for anyone who sincerely desires to be restored. For any who are not living right before God even in the smallest way, I urge you to repent, return, restore, and repeat as often as needed. Charles Spurgeon struggled greatly with guilt. He often lost sleep imagining the Ten Commandments saying to him, “You have broken me.” According to his autobiography, just before his conversion in January 1850, Spurgeon’s anxiety over sin came to a violent climax and he said: “I seemed to be all rottenness, a dunghill of corruption, nothing better, but something a great deal worse.” I really feel that. But even after Spurgeon’s conversion, he continued to combat sins lingering in his life. He confessed, “We know what it is to get under a cloud sometimes: sin within us rises with a darkening force” One of the things that he wrote that touched me in my spirit was, “O my dear hearers, do ask yourselves whether you have sorrowed for sin because it is sin against God; for any hypocrite is sorry for sin which injures himself, or which may damage his reputation among men; but the essential thing is to be sorry because the evil is a wrong done to God.” Repentance is more than feeling guilty; it is recognizing that we have gone the wrong way and choosing to turn back toward God. We do not have to pretend that we have everything together, because God already knows what is in our hearts and invites us to bring it honestly before Him. If you have fallen, do not stay down in shame; get back up, confess it to God, receive His grace, and take the next step toward obedience. None of us walks this Christian life perfectly, but by God’s grace we can keep returning to Him, growing in Him, and becoming more like Christ each day. Please pray for me as I pray for all who read these words to live a life pleasing to God in every way, in public and more so in private, in Jesus’ name, Amen. Closing thought is another quote from Spurgeon, “The Lord is very ready to forgive: it is the church that is unmerciful sometimes, but not the Master: he is ever willing to receive us when we come to him, and to blot out our transgression. . . . Just so does your heavenly Father wait to catch you up, and to press you to his bosom and say, ‘I have loved thee with an everlasting love.’” Conviction should lead us back to God rather than leave us trapped in shame. 

My BeLoved, may the grace and peace of the Lord Jesus, the love of God the Father, and the communion of the Holy Spirit, be with you all. Amen. In Christ Love, douglas. HE>i. pastord.blog

Special Note: I want to thank those who read what I write and are encouraged to support the ministry God has entrusted to me either one time or have decided to give on a monthly basis. I am encouraged to see certain verses playing out before my eyes like what is written in *Philippians 4:16 For even in Thessalonica you sent aid once and again for my necessities. 17 Not that I seek the gift, but I seek the fruit that abounds to your account.*

To any who are interested, please feel free to reach out to me with prayer requests, questions, encouragement, or for information on how to come alongside me with financial support at pastord.blog@gmail.com or I do have a Zelle account associated with my phone number, 5202720387 last name Blaser. Thank you my Beloved for your ongoing prayers and support.