Today I have struggled as to what to write and share which may be due to struggling to have a good night’s sleep lately. Over the past few days there have been many different feelings and emotions that I have had to work through and it has not been pleasant. Recently, I have seen the great work of God in the lives of certain individuals and have also seen the pain and devastation due to sickness, addiction, sin, and death. There have been a few events that have affected my family deeply. The battles that I have been facing have made it difficult for me to hear from God like I have in the past, focus on His word intently, in reality to accomplish anything that I feel that I need to do for the kingdom. In simple terms, I have been a scrambled mess. There have been moments where my heart felt completely overwhelmed, yet somehow God’s grace continued to meet me in the middle of my weakness. Even in the silence, when I could not clearly hear His voice, I could still see His hand sustaining me through every difficult step. I have realized that faith is not proven when life is easy, but when we continue to trust God while walking through uncertainty of the future, confusion of the present, as well as the pain of the past. Some days I have questioned my strength, only to be reminded that His strength is made perfect in my weakness. Though my spirit has been weary, I know that God has never abandoned me, and His promises remain true no matter how heavy the burden feels in the moment. I pray often over what is written in *Isaiah 55:8 “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,” says the Lord. 9 “For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways, And My thoughts than your thoughts.* But as I pray and let God know that “I was thinking” and He says, “your thoughts are not My thoughts.” And then I say “maybe if we go another way” and He responds ”your ways are not My ways.” Then in frustration I say, “I can’t do Your will” and He tells me in a still small voice, “He is with me and can help me to do what He has called me to do.” I feel like I let God down so many times and He reminds me that I was never holding Him up, He was holding me up by His mighty right hand. My prayer that I tend to repeat like a mantra, “Dear Lord, thank You for all that You do for me. Help me to live this day with a Renewed attitude of Gratitude. Please clear my mind of the distractions of all that is going on in the world around me so that I can hear from You clearly. When this world closes in on me, remind me of Jesus’ example – to slip away and find a quiet place to pray. Please continue to use me to do Your will whether it is easy or difficult. Continue to bless me that I may be a blessing to others. Keep me strong that I may help the weak. Keep me uplifted that I may have words of encouragement for the broken. I pray for those who are lost and can’t find their way because at times I am one of them. I pray for those who are misjudged and misunderstood because I know those feelings all too well. I pray for those who don’t know You intimately for I visit that place way too often. Give me confidence in believing that there is no problem, circumstance, or situation greater than what You can handle. Every battle is in Your hands for You to fight because we are not fighting for victory but from victory. Thank you for being a gracious and loving God. I praise You in my pain. I thank You for my trials. I trust You when I am tempted to lose hope. I love You when You feel so far away. You alone are my hope, strength, light, peace, and most of all my comforter. Help me to glorify You in all that I do by the power of the Holy Spirit for the glory of God and not my own, in Jesus’ precious and powerful Name, Amen.” To those who are not sure what to make of this: No matter how difficult the road becomes, I will continue to stand on the promises of God and trust Him through every season of life till I have no more life to live. I know that He is still writing my story, and I know that I need to stop trying to take away His pen. I am determined to keep walking forward in faith even when I cannot see the outcome. With unwavering conviction and complete dependence upon Him, I will continue to serve, love, pray, and believe that God is faithful in all things. May everyone, regardless of where they are in their journey of faith, find peace, strength, and hope in knowing they are deeply loved and never alone. And may we continue to encourage one another with compassion, grace, and solidarity as we all seek truth, healing, and purpose together in and through the Lord Jesus. 

My BeLoved, may the grace of the Lord Jesus, and the love of God the Father, and the communion of the Holy Spirit, be with you all. Amen. In Christ Love, douglas. HE>i. pastord.blog

Special Note: I want to thank those who read what I write and are encouraged to give either one time or have decided to give on a monthly basis in support of the different ministries God has entrusted to me. I am encouraged to see certain verses playing out before my eyes like what is written in *Philippians 4:16 For even in Thessalonica you sent aid once and again for my necessities. 17 Not that I seek the gift, but I seek the fruit that abounds to your account.*

To any who are interested, please feel free to reach out to me with prayer requests, questions, encouragement, or for information on how to come alongside me with financial support for the ministry activities that God has entrusted to me at pastord.blog@gmail.com or I do have a Zelle account associated with my phone number, 5202720387 last name Blaser. Thank you my Beloved for your ongoing prayers and support.