Today’s devotional has been challenging for me to put together for some reason. Not really clear on what to share so I have been led to share my truth of where my head is at today. Not sure if this will make any sense or if it will be just a bunch of random thoughts, but here I go. I don’t have my life all figured out and at the rate I am going I probably won’t till I get to heaven. The truth is, there are times that I just don’t get it and as a Pastor most people expect me to. Even when I am supposed to know it, there are times I don’t feel it. I also do not put on a mask pretending to be something that I am not. There are times when I pray to find out where I should be and what I should do and end up more lost and confused than I was before I started to pray, mostly because I am impatient. I guess I let the cares and concerns of the world cloud my mind and distract me from focusing on what the Lord Jesus has for me. There are many days that I just feel broken and alone. The only thing that makes me feel somewhat good is not pretending otherwise. I have come to many crossroads in my Christianity, trying to figure out whether or not how I am living my life is the way that God wants me to. Even, whether or not being where I have been for the last 25 years is still where I am supposed to stay today. Whenever I am experiencing these struggles, I always look to the scriptures for clarity. I remember reading through Jeremiah and there were certain verses that practically everyone knows, but for some reason at this season of my life they are not bringing me peace and contentment like they used to. It is written in *Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans and thoughts that I have for you,’ says the Lord, ‘plans for peace and well-being and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.* I often pray “Lord, help me to be the Man of God that you have called me to be, one that trusts You in every circumstance, clings to You for help, and relies on You for everything. Remind me today that You are who You say You are and can do what you said in *Jeremiah 32:27 “Behold, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh. Is there anything too hard for Me?* Lord, I want to be a man devoted to You, consecrated to You, and well pleasing to You no matter what is going on in my life. You know my struggles to accomplish even the smallest task lately. Lord, help me to understand all that You have for me to do to help further the kingdom as I call out to you and wait expectantly for You to answer me as written in *Jeremiah 33:3 Call to Me and I will answer you and show you great and mighty things, fenced in and hidden, which you do not know (do not distinguish and recognize, have knowledge of and understand).* To all those who question me about my relationship with God, even in this place of uncertainty, I will choose to believe that He is still working, even when I cannot see it. When my heart feels heavy and my thoughts are scattered, He reminds me that His presence has not left me. I have asked God to help me to rest in the truth that He is patient with me, guiding me step by step, even when I feel stuck, He is there to encourage me, strengthen me, and help me endure. My prayer is simple: Lord, teach me to trust that my weakness is not a barrier to Your love, but a place where Your strength can meet me. And in all of this, Lord, let my life still whisper faith, even on the days when my voice feels too weary to speak it aloud. Lord God, please, please show me something You have for me but more importantly how to have joy today knowing that tomorrow is not promised, in Jesus’ precious and powerful name, Amen.” Maranatha, Come quickly Lord Jesus. 

My BeLoved, may the grace and peace of the Lord Jesus, the love of God the Father, and the communion of the Holy Spirit, be with you all. Amen. In Christ Love, douglas. HE>i. pastord.blog

Special Note: I want to thank those who read what I write and are encouraged to support the ministry God has entrusted to me either one time or have decided to give on a monthly basis. I am encouraged to see certain verses playing out before my eyes like what is written in *Philippians 4:16 For even in Thessalonica you sent aid once and again for my necessities. 17 Not that I seek the gift, but I seek the fruit that abounds to your account.*

To any who are interested, please feel free to reach out to me with prayer requests, questions, encouragement, or for information on how to come alongside me with financial support at pastord.blog@gmail.com or I do have a Zelle account associated with my phone number, 5202720387 last name Blaser. Thank you my Beloved for your ongoing prayers and support.