As a child we did quite a bit of arts and crafts, and one of the things I remember most is having broken crayons. They would be left on the floor, stepped on, broken in two, crushed, and still kept because they had some value and purpose. Trying to color with broken crayons just isn’t the same as using a new one. They are often shorter than the others, with weird jagged edges that make it hard to color in small spaces. Even as a child, I realized no one really wanted to use the broken ones, but I did because they were everywhere. I see the same type of reasoning in a world of broken people. It is easier to avoid than to engage, to discard than to embrace, to write-off than to value. Trauma changes people. It does not define who they are but it does affect what they do and how they respond in certain situations. For many, they put up barriers, and set boundaries to protect themselves from any chance of being hurt. Over the years I have developed a similar mindset at times but have come to experience some tranquility as I read what is written in *Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. 12 Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. 13 And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.* As I read over this verse I look at the character and attributes of God in the words spoken to Jeremiah, and believe that I can apply His care and concern for me in a powerful way as I search for Him with all my heart. I understand all too well what it feels like to be an outcast in society and considered a social reject. At times I feel like I live in the land of misfit toys, being the most prominant misfit. Many times what we see as our biggest regrets, failures and mistakes become what God uses the most in our lives to influence the world around us. God has transformed my brokenness, heartache, and pain into something more beautiful than I could’ve ever imagined, a testimony of His grace and mercy. He took the mess that I made of my life and created a masterpiece with my brokenness. My goal, my life’s purpose is to spend the rest of my life helping broken people to feel a little less broken. I heard it said that “God uses broken things, a broken soil to produce a crop, broken clouds to give rain, broken grain to give bread, broken bread to give strength and broken people to do great things.” I have come to understand that it is through the crucible of adversity that develops any ability for me to be used by God. I choose to trust Him more than I trust my feelings or my circumstances. My prayer is simple and to the point, “Dear Lord, I pray that you would use me to glorify Yourself. Use me just as I am, weak, tired, and broken. Help me to use my brokenness, Lord, to mend the brokenhearted around me. Let the comfort I receive from You in my trials overflow to others, that they too may know Your grace and mercy. I lay down my own plans, my own reputation, and my own safety at Your feet. I take the yoke of Your will upon me, knowing it is better than my own thoughts and dreams. Refine me Lord, through the trials and tribulations of this life. Let the impurities be burned away, so that only Your likeness remains in me. Whatever it takes, whatever it costs, I pray that You would receive glory by my life and if need be by my death, in Jesus’ precious and powerful name, Amen.

My BeLoved, may the grace and peace of the Lord Jesus, the love of God the Father, and the communion of the Holy Spirit, be with you all. Amen. In Christ Love, douglas. HE>i. pastord.blog

Special Note: I want to thank those who read what I write and are encouraged to support the ministry God has entrusted to me either one time or have decided to give on a monthly basis. I am encouraged to see certain verses playing out before my eyes like what is written in *Philippians 4:16 For even in Thessalonica you sent aid once and again for my necessities. 17 Not that I seek the gift, but I seek the fruit that abounds to your account.*

To any who are interested, please feel free to reach out to me with prayer requests, questions, encouragement, or for information on how to come alongside me with financial support at pastord.blog@gmail.com or I do have a Zelle account associated with my phone number, 5202720387 last name Blaser. Thank you my Beloved for your ongoing prayers and support.