A little while back in my morning devotions I was reading through Matthew and I came across a couple sections of the Scriptures that brought questions to my mind as to how genuine my faith really is. I have not seen Jesus, I have not walked with Jesus, I have not touched Jesus, but with all that I am, I trust in Him, I cling to Him, and rely on Him, through the good times and the bad, or at least I would like to believe that I do. The question that keeps coming to my mind is, “Is it just because life has not been good enough or bad enough causing me to depart?” The Lord Jesus was celebrating the Passover, and there was a moment that changed the disciple’s outlook as they each questioned their own heart before Him. It is written in *Matthew 26:20 When evening had come, He sat down with the twelve. 21 Now as they were eating, He said, “Assuredly, I say to you, one of you will betray Me.”* It is not the statement that is so concerning to me, it is the response to the question by the men who had invested three years of their lives into following this Man, their Teacher, their Lord and Master every day. It is written in *Matthew 26:22 And they were exceedingly sorrowful, and each of them began to say to Him, “Lord, is it I?”* A short time later was another moment in time that I feel should cause all Christians to question their own devotion to the Lord Jesus, well at least for me it is. They are the words written in *Matthew 26:31 Then Jesus said to them, “All of you will be made to stumble because of Me this night, for it is written: ‘I will strike the Shepherd, And the sheep of the flock will be scattered.’* Have you ever doubted your own devotion to the Lord? In all honesty I have, and worse than that I have had times where I have become complacent in my relationship with Him. I think “How different am I from these men who witnessed His miracles, who heard His voice?” when I would rather run away and spend two hours watching a movie with no spiritual value than to spend fifteen minutes in the Word getting to know Him a little deeper, a little richer, a little more personal, a little more intimate. I would love to say that I have the boldness of Peter when he said what he did in *Matthew 26:33 Peter answered and said to Him, “Even if all are made to stumble because of You, I will never be made to stumble.”* but I don’t know if I do. I question myself as to “How deep is my love for Jesus?” and “What would it take for me to scatter?” After reading through this chapter I realized that these men that walked with the Lord Jesus were just that, men. Our nature today in all reality is not much different than theirs was two thousand years ago. As this chapter ends, the closing statements by the Lord and the following comments by not just Peter but of all of the disciples convict my heart before God. It is written in *Matthew 26:34 Jesus said to him, “Assuredly, I say to you that this night, before the rooster crows, you will deny Me three times.” 35 Peter said to Him, “Even if I have to die with You, I will not deny You!” And so said all the disciples.* The prediction of these events and playing out here of the denials, is recorded in all four Gospels. For me, this is a powerful reflection about my own condition in my relationship with the Lord Jesus at times, that my faith is probably more vulnerable than I care to admit because I have not endured prison, struggled in poverty, or suffered severe persecution. The Lord Jesus said that the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. My fervent prayer is, “Lord, I pray today that Your people will learn to cleave to You more than ever before, especially me. We as Your people need to experience Your presence and have renewed affection for You, knowing the greatness of Your love, grace and mercy are the most precious blessings we receive. Please Lord, I beseech You on behalf of Your Children to help us to live in a way that shows the world around us who You are and that we love You more today than yesterday and that no matter what comes our way help us not to deny You, in Jesus’ precious and powerful name, Amen.” In Christ Love, douglas. HE>i. pastord.blog
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